World map duvet

Posted on August 9, 2013 by Anne Ku

This morning I “inserted” my Chinese silk duvet into the 100% cotton world map duvet cover that my brother gave me years ago. I had nearly forgotten what seeing and sleeping under a world map did for me.

World map duvet cover

World map duvet cover

For many years, it was the shining light at the end of the dark and narrow tunnel of my PhD, which stood for “piled higher and deeper.” I didn’t know when it would end but knew that if I didn’t finish and get that degree, all would be for naught. I would not be able to say “I got my PhD” but only say “I’ve completed the work required for a PhD.” The map kept me going. After I obtained my doctorate, I flew around the world to Houston. From there, I attended conferences in Atlanta, Boston, San Diego, Mexico, Washington, DC — I’ve lost track.

Later in the Netherlands, as a struggling musician in a cold and windy country where I didn’t speak the language well, I experienced cloudy bouts of hopelessness. Where was the conservatory education leading to? What happened to me? The world map duvet cover reminded me there was more to life than my present struggles. And I did eventually travel as a performing musician – to London, Belgium, Spain, Italy, Denmark, and even America.

So it’s timely that I take out this world map duvet cover, after several years of storage in the closet. Although I live in tropical paradise, the Hawaiian islands are also considered the most isolated land mass on earth, 5 hour flight to the nearest “mainland” USA and 7 to 8 hours to Tokyo. I can’t just jump on a plane and go away for a long weekend, unless it’s island hopping. This is not Europe. I shouldn’t complain, but I must not forget my dream.

I want to visit every country before I die.

I have a wanderlust. I cannot rest from travel. Find me a job that pays me to travel.

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Creating

Posted on June 18, 2013 by Anne Ku

On the first day of a 5-consecutive day writing workshop, I learned to view writing as a process, not a product. To get started, we did free writing, which is a form of pre-writing to warm up. On a blank sheet of paper, we simply start writing and keep writing until a certain preset time limit is met. Today we were given 30 minutes and an optional prompt — to start with the words “This morning.”

After a few minutes, I forgot what was occupying my mind. I got into the flow of writing. When the teacher called out the remaining minutes — 10, and then —- 5, I noticed that I was reluctant to stop. I had gotten into the momentum of writing.

In another exercise, we were each given a small white styrofoam plate with 3 different colored sticks of clay. When asked to create something out of the clay, I immediately set out to use the 3 pieces intact in as little time as possible to create the following object, minus the green arrow.

Clay object from a writing workshop

Clay object from a writing workshop

As I revelled in my work, I found myself becoming very attached to it. When the teacher asked us to remove something, I had trouble “harming” the figure. In contrast, the lady next to me, didn’t care. She did not agonize over what to get rid of. She was detached.

The more I looked at my object, the more I fell in love with it, and the less I was able to change it. We were then asked to walk around the room and comment on other people’s work. Only then did I realize that my object was not the most unique or most artistic. This process humbled me.

Moral of the story?

You need to get out of yourself and your situation to see what else is out there. Creating and writing are forms of self-expression. It’s just as important to see other possibilities as being able to express your own.

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Feedback

Posted on June 10, 2013 by Anne Ku

Feedback is something that allows us to adjust to how others see us. Depending on whom you ask, you will get different answers.

When I ask my sister what I’m good at, she says simply, “selling.”  I disagree. I can be engaging. I have promoted electric vehicles as enthusiastically as I have promoted concerts, but that’s not “selling.”

So what am I good at?

I will use this page to document the feedback I have received over the years. Perhaps some of my friends, colleagues, and readers would care to LEAVE A REPLY below.

It seems to me that you have found a position that takes advantage of your unique skills: the ability to understand a new subject quickly and the interest in talking to people about their specialties. I have been amazed by how well you have tackled such diverse subjects and made it understandable.

Risk manager, Oregon-based energy trading company

Thank you so much for performing at the Mayor’s Charity fundraiser on the 19th of December 2003. I was so grateful that you were able to attend at such short notice and entertain us for most of the evening.

I believe an enjoyable evening was had by all; I hope that you managed to enjoy the evening in between performances. I also received many compliments on the choice of entertainment chosen to accompany dinner and hope that you received such compliments on the night too.

I am pleased to announce that I have now raised just over £20,000 for my chosen charities; I thank you for your invaluable support.

The Mayor of Ealing, 23 December 2003

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Reinventing myself

Posted on June 7, 2013 by Anne Ku

About half a year ago my website anneku.com got hacked. My e-mail address stopped working. My webhost stopped hosting the contents of my site to prevent further attacks to the server. My identity was erased from cyberspace.

It echoed a certain deja vu of Tuesday 11 September 2001. I could have disappeared from the top floor where a risk management conference was taking place. Instead, I watched the twin towers crumble and vanish from our staff meeting room above Penn Station. That week in Manhattan, amidst the uncertainty and chaos, changed the way I viewed life.

Today I decided to rebuild my site on wordpress, just as I try to declutter and simplify my existence in the physical world. In parallel, I must choose what to keep, what to give away, what to throw away, and what to sell.

In reinventing myself for the nth time, I ask the same questions: what is important to me? what have I done? what am I good at? what do I want to do?

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